She’s falling apart. Are emotions really worth having?

Question by Sparky: She’s falling apart. Are emotions really worth having?
(AW13: go ahead and skip the first two paragraphs, the new problem is towards the end, and it’s extraordinarily difficult)

My girlfriend had what some psychologists call a “flat affect”. We’ve been together for two years. At first I was only interested in her because of her innumerable peculiarities – brilliance in some facets of life, and staggering naivete in others, all with a distinct lack of emotion. After a while of knowing her, I found myself captivated in a way, like a child with a puzzle box, and every so often she would reveal an immense beauty that it seems few others have eyes discerning enough to see. When I proposed a romantic relationship, she said at first that it would be “acceptable”.

In recent months, she started to change, moving beyond the monotone in slight, subtle ways. She and I recently started to connect in a way that indicated she thought the relationship was more than just “acceptable”. From semi-obscure subtle affectionate gestures to spontaneous unpremeditated (and frankly spectacular) lovemaking, I love her to bits and suspected greatly she felt the same. When she and I are together, alone, and just about to fall asleep, she clings to me in a way you wouldn’t expect from meeting the soft-spoken “heartless robot.”

She used to be obsessively neat, keeping a very clean apartment, but as she started showing facets emotion, she also started becoming rather sloppy. Over just the last two weeks or so, she’s started to seem like a wreck, and it’s only getting worse. She started showing far more emotion than usual, to the point of rapidly rambling absurdities when she gets stressed out. She hasn’t been sleeping more than three hours a night and when I propose we go out, she replies, “I would prefer not to.” That’s difficult to argue with.

So the problem’s this: I asked her what’s been wrong, what’s changed and if there was anything I could do to help. She replied with the most spectacular series of mixed messages, she’s gone on about how I cloud her judgment, then later on said that I make everything very clear. The conversation went on for a while, and I think I learned something about ancient Greek military strategy before she finally told me outright (in many words, some of them nonsensical) that she loves me. Almost immediately after that, before I could do anything, she basically strong-armed me out of her apartment looking completely miserable. She wouldn’t let me back in.

We talked about love before, and she said she couldn’t understand it, and therefore couldn’t comment. She was stable before, sane and serene in a sad sort of way. I always figured if she said she loved me out loud, I would be thrilled – but between our relationship and other factors in her life, she’s falling apart. Her mind simply isn’t equipped to deal with this degree of emotion, and I can’t help but think she might be better off as she was.

Sorry for the long and probably incoherent question, it’s been a difficult night and I’m quite tired.
She’s been very careful to avoid any meetings between myself and her family, and I’ve decided to respect that. I’ll meet ‘em when she’s ready for me to.

Best answer:

Answer by LI
Wow,give her time,she will get over it.You know she can not possibly stay away from you for long if she truly loves you as she claims.

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